Staying Positive in Chaotic Times !

When times turn turbulent, it doesn't take much and too long for negativity to creep in our lives. The chaos that ensues as a result of crisis makes it difficult for us to see possibilities and solutions around us (and within). Everything seems unpredictable/ uncertain and we tend to fall trap to gloom and despair. Amidst all these challenges and the feeling of hopelessness, positivity appears as the only saviour to see us through these difficult times. Positivity holds the potential to create possibilities where none exist and the sooner we imbibe positivity in our daily actions, the faster we equip ourselves to handle adversities that may mar our progress in life.

Here are my 5 Tips to build Positivity, especially when it matter most to us 

• Stay Connected with Friends and Family - To cope effectively with any crisis, there cannot be a better morale boosting support system than our family and friends. Having them around to talk to and share with, helps us deal effectively with the range of negative emotions and feelings that get manifested in us. A simple call or text/ message could be a good start point to reaching out to them. Staying connected is a good way to express our care for the other person. Remember to look beyond your virtual/ social network. 

• Work towards Holistic Wellness - Any crisis takes its toll on us, in every possible way, be it physically, mentally or emotionally. Focusing on and achieving holistic wellness keeps us in balance and in better shape to cope with the adversities. As the famous saying goes that "Tough times don't last but Tough People do" and that's precisely what we need to follow by paying attention to our overall well-being and there are very simple steps to achieve that . Few of those are 

• PHYSICAL - Exercising, Yoga, Running or Walking ; Drinking plenty of water and eating healthy diet/ food, especially immunity boosting food and fruits
• MENTAL - Engaging in Positive Thinking; Practicing Meditation or Mindfulness that can help make the body calm and mind peaceful, which is so much required in these type of situations. 
• EMOTIONAL - Reaching out to support professional/ group and expressing fears, concerns, feelings which may turn out to be harmful if not addressed and expressed  appropriately. 

• Exercise Restraint on Social Media - The Social Media has a huge impact on our lives and influences our perceptions, mindset and judgement. With consistent poking, it is but natural for us to get swayed by what we encounter/ come across on various online platforms and a lot of that stuff happens to be dark and negative. During chaos and crisis, it becomes important to exercise some restraint what we post and share on Social Media and equally important is what we read online.These sensitive times call for everyone to be an ambassador of Positivity on Social Media and spread hope and optimism instead of fear and panic.

• Balance the ME - We all tend to become a bit selfish and self-focused when crisis happen. Our every action is about placing our own needs first and most of the time it is at the cost of others. We need to realise that our existence is dependent on the existence of our fellow being and if an apocalypse happens (exaggeration to the extreme :) ), we all will perish. The point to remember here is to maintain that essential balance between self-interest and the greater interest of everybody (who can get impacted). The need of the hour is to understand the interconnected nature of our existence and act responsibly. We need to maintain the balance between ME and WE and wherever needed, let's shrink our ME to make way for the WE. 

• Get "Real" about Life - The sooner we come to terms with life, the sooner we develop acceptance for the vagaries of life. We can't always be in control of things around us and at times, the best way to deal with the adversities in life is to stay calm, be patient, do the needful and let the storm past ! 

What's Your Doorway To Life ?

Haven't we been spectators to our own life many a times when it spirals downwards, roller coasting downhill ? Those days when everything appears challenging and things just seem to go from bad to worse, when reaction overtakes the response and the external forces appear too many to handle and  then we assume that the only option left with us is to "confront" and the only thought that crosses our mind is to wait for things to get better (only if they will).

The events in life are never in our control and they may occur anytime, anywhere and in any form. Quite contrary to the events in out life and much against the popular belief, the outcome of any event is never pre-defined and is always under our control. Just a case in point - consider the day that starts off with a minor irritation but ends up with an exhibition of full blown anger. Few things that may still have gone in our favour also go the other way. Life seems like slipping away from our hold/ grip and and we are left in the lurch wondering what went wrong. The blame gets passed on to the events that occurred which catapulted a manageable day into an unmanageable one. 

All this while when the reasons were being sought to pass on the blame, a little introspection could have worked wonder. A little thought to the following could have brought back the control of the day and of life. 

Ask yourself - What's controlling my life and what's determining the outcomes in my life ?

And when we ask yourself the above, let's not settle for the most convenient and easy answer which is "external events". If that would have been the correct answer, then just about everyone would have been struggling to control/ manage their life. How is it, then, that so many still seize control of their life when they sense it slipping away ?  

The mantra is quite simple - "Identify your doorway to life !", which means finding out through what lens do we view life. Simply put, the doorway defines our attitude to life and the values/ philosophy we live by. Though the day may not begin as per our expectations many a times and we may face unfavourable situations, events or circumstances but still we can end our day well if our doorway is of positivity, hope, trust, faith, teamwork, and anything that makes our life better in some way. 

Getting perturbed by unfavourable events is easy and this can play spoiler in our unless we build a doorway on the foundation of trust and confidence - trust that things may seem bad right now but will surely get better in future, so let me focus on what this experience has to teach me; confidence in self that I possess the requisite capability and capacity to turn it around by holding onto enabling and empowering positive thoughts and actions.  

Always remember that we can seize the control of our life whenever we want to and nothing external can determine the outcome in my life except myself. Once I imbibe this, all I need to do is to build a doorway that's always empowering for me, helping me to accomplish more and evolve.

So, let's do whatever it takes to build a doorway that will even inspire the Universe to conspire and help us attract peace, love, harmony , success and happiness in our life !

 

WILLPOWER makes a WINNER#AtoZChallenge

W is for WILLPOWER

Many a times winning is more to do with our inner ability and strength rather than the external skill or knowledge. The true test of a winner’s personality is his/ her ability to push themselves towards accomplishing the goal(s) or completing the task at hand in spite of all odds and many challenges. This ability is termed as WILLPOWER and is a necessary personality trait for anyone wanting to achieve great/ big things in life. WILLPOWER connotes inner strength and/ or determination needed to overcome all obstacles and always be inspired to complete the task at hand, those tasks which others may give up because they are hard to finish. 

Why WILLPOWER is important ?

·         Gives us the power of choice – either to give up or move on and be an achiever

·         Enables us to overcome any difficult problem or obstacle 
      with ease

·         Gives us inner strength to take tough actions in life and be ready for any challenge

·         Build us determination to complete the task and achieve the defined goals

·         Helps us move out of our comfort zone and adapt quickly to any kind of CHANGE in life

·         Gives us an edge over our competitors and make us competitive

·         Builds a positive self-image; positively impacts our self-esteem; boosts our self-confidence

·         Builds a strong character person

 How to build WILLPOWER ?

·         See the BIG picture instead of focusing on short-term benefits of achieving any goal

·         Be creative by taking up challenging tasks

·         Develop a solution-oriented mind set to find ways to do things

·         Break up goals into smaller and manageable sub-goals which are easier to track and achieve

·         Develop inner strength through practices like Mindfulness, Yoga and Meditation

·         Use Affirmations to build up positive self-image and self-confidence

·         Adopt an action-oriented approach in life – always willing to try out things and attempt them

·         Don’t get overwhelmed with the task/ goal. Think action and the sub-goal

·         Overconfidence is a killer. Don’t assume success. Take every task as new and give it your best try

Let your WILLPOWER be the magic wand of SUCCESS !  

REBOOT life to REINVENT#AtoZChallenge

R is for REBOOT

Setbacks and Failures are as much a part of our life as Success and Advancement. An indication of a successful life is not considered in terms of how many times have we succeeded or failed but in terms of how many times have we come up trumps in spite of barriers and hang-ups, some predictable and some unforeseen. Many a times in our life we get stuck at some point and lose vision of way forward. This happen due to various reasons, some of which are  1. choosing a wrong goal, 2. taking inappropriate actions, 3. Living in our comfort zone , 4. Unconducive environment/ eco-system to operate.  But irrespective of the reason, we get impacted at mental, physical and emotional level making us susceptible to failure and regression. The haze and lack of clarity demands a REBOOT of our life to sort things out, seek clarity and move forward. The way, a computer needs a reboot when it stops responding or gets stuck, likewise our life also needs a REBOOT to help us troubleshoot  life and put us back in a state of readiness to face life's challenges.

Why REBOOT is necessary ?

·         First and foremost, because all of us want to progress in life and be an accomplisher

·         Provides an opportunity to do a SWOT for our self and identify the gaps holding us back from moving forward in life

·         When procrastination and avoidance sets in our attitude/ approach indicating a look into the reasons for the same

·         At times we may go off-track of lose clarity about our goals and actions

·         Acts as a checkpoint to take stock of our purpose, goals and actions in life

·         Acts as a calming point when we get overwhelmed with goals, tasks and situations in life

·         At times we stop enjoying doing our tasks indicating that our passion has died and we no longer feel excited about things we are attempting  

How to REBOOT ?

·         Perform a Need Analysis on self to establish the need for REBOOT and then do a SWOT to identify the gap area(s) in terms of skill, attitude or action

·         If we don’t feel passionate and excited about the current goals, rework and establish goals in alignment with our values. Once new goals are established, start taking small steps towards them

·         In case we feel stuck but still feel excited and passionate about our current goals then we need to identify and list down what is holding us – is it fear, anxiety, failure, some situation or certain people ? Once identified,  focus on what is within our scope of control and can be changed by us

·         Build regular checkpoints towards the goals we are attempting to achieve. This will help take corrective action in time and do a REBOOT right when it is needed

·         Identify activity that would help us in a creative state of mind to review our life in an unbiased and non-judgemental way. It could be Mindfulness, Meditation, Journaling and maybe even Self-Coaching.     

·         Maintain good self-belief and high self-esteem to enable us to improve our self.

·         Take a break / sabbatical and do what we love to and feel happy about. This would put us in a creative state and help us REBOOT   

So, REBOOT life, REWORK on self and RE-INVENT life ! 

PURPOSE is POWER#AtoZChallenge

P is for PURPOSE

Life is all about living to grow, evolve and achieve and for this to happen, life needs to be in forward movement always. We need to be constantly striving to reach our destination, all excited and enthused. This driving force which pulls us towards our goal/ destination is PURPOSE, the thing that gives meaning to our life.  We can’t live our life like a rudderless boat, going where the wind takes us. We need to be sure about the direction we want to take. To make our existence worthwhile we need on earth, we need to be aware of what we live for, what we seek, what impact we want to make on others through our existence. For making it happen, we need to harness the POWER of PURPOSE and turn it (Purpose) into a catalyst of our progress in life. PURPOSE is also like our underlying philosophy to live our life.

Why PURPOSE is important ?

• It brings clarity in our life as we get to know our expectations
• It provides direction to our life. We get to understand the path we need to tread finish point we need an
• It establishes the philosophy to live our life. This philosophy guides all our actions and moves us closer to our goal
• It gives meaning to our life as we develop intrinsic motivation to keep giving it our best
• It makes us more productive and efficient as all our energies are focused on our identified  purpose
• It makes us an achiever as we keep accomplishing things aligned with our life’s PURPOSE
• It helps us get focused and in control of our life
• It challenges us, push us to our limits and enable us reach our full potential

How to identify PURPOSE ?

• Identify what we are most passionate about and what gives us feeling of satisfaction. The answer to this would be our PURPOSE in life
• Identify our fundamental values in life and the reason/ logic for these would be our PURPOSE
• Define goals that align with our fundamental values. Detailing the goals further in terms of objectives and outcomes will help us arrive at our PURPOSE
• Deep reflection of our interest and passion will unmask our PURPOSE to us
• Identify doing what gives the maximum satisfaction and a sense of achievement
• The act of critically questioning ourself will help boil down to our PURPOSE
•  Be creative and try out new things. This may reveal us our missing PURPOSE
• Engage in activities/ exercise that help connect us with our subconscious. Meditation, Yoga and Visualisation are few such activities

So, Live with PURPOSE and make a real DIFFERENCE ! 

OPTIMISM creates OPPORTUNITIES#AtoZChallenge

O is for OPTIMISM

A happy and abundant life is built step-by-step based on the choices we make or decisions we take at every moment in our life. Some moments are life changing and determine the course/ direction our life will take.  It’s during these crucial moments that the choice we make becomes so critical. Every moment provides us with 2 choices – be an Optimist or a Pessimist. The choice of Optimism brings out the best in us; even the word “Optimism” has roots in Latin, derived from the word “Optimum” denoting “the best”. Optimism or the tendency to look at the brighter side of everything and is more of an attitude or mindset that carry us through tough times. 

Why OPTIMISM is important ?

·         Builds an progressive and positive attitude towards life in our thoughts and actions

·         Helps us see possibilities and opportunities in every situation/ circumstance

·         Build and strengthens our coping skills which helps when confronted with failure/ setback/ rejection·         Keeps us self-motivated which enables us achieve more in life

·         Provides health benefits in terms of ensuring better and healthy cardiovascular system, better immunity. Being positive and optimistic releases serotonin, which creates a sense of well-being

·         Makes us more solution oriented where we focus more on finding positive ways to problems

·         Increases our level of self-esteem and self-confidence

·         Renders us more clear and organised in our thoughts and actions, thereby managing time better

·         Build in ability to take more risks and try put new things

How to build OPTIMISM ?  

·         Build a mindset of acceptance that things may go wrong. Keep revisiting your beliefs and remove those which hold you back from seeing the bright side of life. Practice mindfulness 

·         Stop seeking perfection in everything , rather start focusing on progress. Start taking small steps towards the goals

·         Be in the company of people who uplift and motivate. These people help us see the positive/ bright side of things

·         Reminding our self about our accomplishments, however small they may be helps us be positive. Celebrate the little successes

·         Practice Smiling more as it releases good chemicals (dopamine, endorphins and serotonin) in our brain/ body

·         Be watchful of the language/ words we use and make our statements more accomplishing in nature 

Capitalise on all the OPPORTUNITIES that OPTIMISM provides to achieve more in life ! 

NEGATE Your NEMESIS#AtoZChallenge

N is for NEMESIS

There are times in our lives when in our quest to achieve success and abundance we falter at the last moment and give it away. What could have been a remarkable achievement turns out to be a dismal failure just because of something that holds us back from crossing the last mile. All of us have our own NEMESIS which play spoilsport. The NEMESIS exist in the form of emotion, situation, event or person and these act as barriers to our growth in life. On all those occasions we have choked at the last moment and not managed to cross the finish line has been because of NEMESIS. They stick on to us permanently (till addressed appropriately ) and become a bane for us. Most of the times the NEMESIS may be attributes to the psychological aspect of our personality. Fear, Anxiety, Peers, Superiors, Big occasions – just about anything could act as a NEMESIS.

Why addressing NEMESIS is critical ?

·         They impact all aspects of our personality – emotional, social and psychological and make us tentative in our personal and professional areas.

·         It acts as an insight into our inner self

·         They act as hindrance towards achieving our goals

·         They impact our inner personality negatively – resulting in low self-confidence and low self-esteem

·         We start playing the victim card in our lives and develop an excuse-ridden approach to life

·         Render us indecisive and doubtful about anything major or big that we attempt to achieve

·         The spirit of competitiveness tends to die in us as our competent nature takes a hit

How to address NEMESIS ?

NEMESIS in our life tends to make us live with assumption that external factors have a role to play in our plight but the reality is that the factors for our sad plight/ inability to cross the finish line are all internal and our individual self is responsible for it. Be it any situation, the power of choice lies with us and this locus of control lies within us and the key to rise above the odds is to negate the nemesis by working on self. Few ways to achieve the same are as mentioned below:

·         Awareness about our Nemesis to clearly identify what needs to be worked upon

·         Self-reflection through SWOT analysis

·         Positive self-talk to establish belief in self and raise self-esteem. This will help raise our self-confidence

·         Practice Visualisation about situation where you want to be succeed  

·         Getting organised and setting proper goals with deadlines

·         Treat failure or the inability to finish as a feedback and improve on the gap areas

So, Negate your Nemesis and earn a life filled with Success, Happiness and Abundance !

INSPIRATION for Impossible#AtoZChallenge

I is for INSPIRATION

We, Humans are always seeking more in life – more success, more happiness, more achievement and much more. This quest for more challenges us to go for the impossible at times. All that is needed by us to accept the challenge and go for the impossible is a stimulus, something that spurs us to give it our best shot. This stimulus arrives in the form of Inspiration, a force that enables us to do creative things, do something really extraordinary or do the same thing in an extraordinary way. Whether external or internal, Inspiration produces a holistic impact on us that generates extraordinary ability in us to go for the impossible. Inspiration could be derived from variety of source such as person, place, thing, story, event, book and many more. Inspiration is very uplifting by nature !

Why Inspiration is important ?

·         Helps us  generate “Aha !” moments in our life

·         Helps us move out of the stuck state

·         Helps us progress and evolve in life by keeping us positive and focused on our goals

·         To help us realise and make use of the unlimited capability and potential  that each of us  possess

·         To enable us to achieve extraordinary things, earlier thought to be impossible

·         To enable us generate creative ideas and generate path-breaking innovations

·         Ensures a positive self-esteem in us as at times we tend to look inwards to derive inspiration  

·         Improves our relationship as we become inspiration (role model) for others.

How to find Inspiration in life ?

·         Identify the reason for seeking inspiration as it will throw light on where and why you are stuck

·         Be aware of which of the five senses spurs inspiration in you as this will help you seek inspiration from appropriate avenue

·         Always celebrate even the small victories and success as these memories act as trigger when we seek internal motivation

·         Always be positive about the situation/ event as this will put us in a creative mind set

·         Inspiration is built on positive self-esteem so engage in positive self-talk and affirmations

·         Pursue your hobbies as they put us in a relaxed and creative state 

·         Be action oriented to channelize the energies properly

·         Try be a role model for others as this will instil the feeling of inspiration

·         Be open to anything new as that might turn out to be a new source of inspiration 

Be always inspired because if you are then impossible is also possible !

The "Why" Trap !

“Why does this happen to me always ?

Why am I singled out everytime ?

Why did he/ she do that to me ?

Why did he/ she say that to me ?

Why did he/ she/ they treat me like that ?

Why don’t I get what I deserve ?

Why do I have to struggle for everything in life ?"

If you relate to any of the above statements, it’s clearly an indication that you have fallen prey to the “Why” Trap – a trap that leaves you with no option but to question every “not so favourable” thing that happens in your life. This leaves you with no energy and enthusiasm to move forward and enjoy life. This “stuck” condition can have dire consequences on our mental and physical well-being as it manifests negativity in us by generating feelings of sadness, depression and anger. These feelings make us feel “victimized” and start the downward spiral resulting in low self-esteem and loss of self-confidence.

The sooner we realize the “Why” syndrome in us, the better prepared we can be to check it becoming an epidemic and engulfing our personality and well-being (physical, mental and emotional). Some of the ways to move out of “Why” trap are as mentioned below :

• ·         Accepting life as it (status quo) and “experiencing” it rather than “judging” it – As life unfolds it brings along “surprises”  and “shocks” both and we cannot be always prepared for what life brings to us. At times we are left wondering as to what struck us and are unable to cope with what happens. The mere realization that life is unpredictable and would unfold as it has to will help us a deal in building more acceptance towards what happens and being more patient towards letting it happen. 
• ·         Replace “victimized” feeling with the power to choose your “response” to various difficult situations – The fact that we do not have much control over most situations that occur in our life leaves us feeling like a “victim” and defensive in our approach. This can be easily counteracted with the mere realization that all of us have been endowed with the power to choose our own response to situation and we can choose how we would like to feel (sad or glad) based on how we respond to the situation. A response of positively reacting to situation could help open up many more opportunities for us to grow and move forward.
• ·         Focusing on “Action” as action generates solutions – Given that the “Why” syndrome leaves us “stuck”, so it becomes imperative that we resort to taking “actions”, even though it could be some baby steps/ micro steps to be still in motion and on the road to growth.
• ·         Focus on “Self” for your capabilities – The “Why” syndrome results in low self-esteem which leads us to focus on our weaknesses and incapabilities as we are filled with self doubt. If we start focusing on our strengths and past successes, it will provide us with the right impetus to break the “Why” trap and move ahead positively and progressively. 
• ·         Replace “Why” mindset with “How” and “When” – To move out of the stuck state that “Why” syndrome lands us in it’s imperative to change the mindset to a more active state. A mindset change to “How” and “When” helps bring in action and purpose in our approach. The focus shifts to solutions and goals.

So, get started now and turn your life around from “Why” to “Wow” !

N.B. - The above post is inspired by article from Lauren E. Miller